im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
