I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Randomize
