No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
