Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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