it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
