no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
