we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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