She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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