God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
