in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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