just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
why is half of my head shaved?
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