susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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