question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
The air was thick with penises
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
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