I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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