In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
