I puked a lego.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
