I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Come share oat with me in your robe
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
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