is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
