make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
