God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
