Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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