Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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