i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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