They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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