There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
