Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
