Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
