Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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