But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Send help, water and tortillas.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
