So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Randomize
