whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
