I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Randomize
