I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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