i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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