Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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