I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
