Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
