no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Randomize
