I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize