I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
