i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Randomize
