I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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