Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
