woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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