At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I need a burrito and a hug.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
