I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
