Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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