she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
