eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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