It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
so let's talk penis.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Randomize
