when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
