She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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